Most of us cringe at the thought of saying no.  We think that it is not an option.  We don’t want to disappoint.  Etc.  However, saying yes to everything creates an untenable position for you and for your organization.  Esther Derby in "The Benefits of No" gives us an essential management tool, a three-point approach to saying no:

1.  Start by affirming the requester;  let them know you are listening.

In “Web Rage:  Why It Happens, What it Costs, How to Stop” authors Daniel Goleman and Clay Sinsky point out that most forms of electronic commnication – i.e, email, IM, and telephony – cannot provide those subtle, mainly non-verbal clues that help us form our interactions in those conversations.  Without these signals we may speak (or write) inappropriately, be robbed of essential tools to support decision making, be denied the abili

We all like to be treated with appropriate respect and consideration as we go through the several roles we have each day.  And, we bemoan the fact that in the fast-paced world we find ourselves in even the most basic decencies such as saying "hello" and "goodbye," or remembering and using the names of people we interact with often drop by the wayside.  In "Building Effective Corporate Cultures One Decency at a Time"  <

One of the topics we discuss in the IT Leaders Program is giving and receiving both positive and negative feedback.  In today's reading "Learning to Accept Criticism", John Baldoni reinforces the importance of giving and receiving  criticism noting that they are essential leadership capabilities.  He then gives several helpful suggestions:

  -  Know your facts -- if you are going to criticize your boss (and for that matter anyone), you'd better get it right.